Happy Father’s Day
My whole life it seems I’ve been running behind. I’m never prepared so I spend a lot of time wishing I had done this or that. It’s a major character flaw that I’m quite aware of yet never seem to be able to change my ways. I took that after my mother.
Not my dad though. He’s always prepared. He was a Boy Scout… Be prepared. I remember many fond family stories of him and his family in the Boy Scouts and how it helped prepare him for life. I tried Brownies as a child, but never went on to Girl Scouts. I don’t think they were quite the same. The boys always seemed like they got to do fun and adventurous things while we were taught to cook and sew. All good things to know, but not nearly as exciting as camping or swimming.
By the time my son was of age to try Boy Scouts, or Cub Scouts rather… things had drastically changed from when my dad was a boy. It was disappointing and didn’t live up to the grand stories my dad had always shared. I compared it to glorified babysitting. Alas, my son didn’t last long. Maybe two years. I don’t blame him for not wanting to continue.
Coming back around to not being prepared… It seems I’ve not prepared a fun Father’s Day for either of the Fathers in my life. No fun cookout, no cake, pie or pans of brownies. My mom usually had some sort of plan, usually to eat out. But really if I think back it was probably my Grandma. She made things special. Mom did too, but it was different, she was always unorganized. I do get it honest. Grandma (my dad’s mom) made sure we all got together and celebrated. She made sure that there were cards to be had and presents to be given.
So today, this Father’s Day I’m feeling really guilty. I have no cards to give or special treats. It’s times like these that I feel the loss of a big family. Most of my family has died off. The family you have around when your a kid I mean. My dad sits at home, alone. We did celebrate with steak dinner last night because we thought today would be a madhouse anywhere. But it always feels weird not to celebrate something the day of to me. I’ve talked to Dad and he’s fine. He went out with his old man friends and they had their usual Sunday lunch together, so I’m glad he wasn’t alone.
My son’s father sits on the couch watching TV. I asked him what he’d like to do, but I guess he’s doing it. Maybe Father’s Day was no big deal to his family. His father has since passed, 17 years now.
I didn’t start out this post with sadness in mind. I meant to just share a sketch I found that I made of my dad way back when I was 15 years old. It was not bad and I can remember that morning like it was yesterday still.
We all loved to sleep in around my house and this was a Sunday morning and we (my mom, me and Dad) were sitting on the large sectional couch together. Dad was reading the paper, his hair disheveled from just waking up. Mom was drinking coffee and looking at the Sunday ads. I had a loose piece of paper and drew a quick sketch of his profile. I’m not sure why I didn’t draw it in my sketchbook.
I remember showing it to him and how surprised he looked when he turned to me and said this is really good. I was so proud in having drawn something that he thought was good. Dad was a fantastic illustrator. He had books and books of his sketches from when he was a boy. I remember pouring over them growing up.
Dad has always been supportive with my art. He got me my first sketchbook. He’s always been there with gentle suggestions on how to get better or how to think about it differently, more creatively. He got me jobs doing side summer hustles working with his companies. We even ended up working together before I quit to have my son. We’ve always had a special relationship.
Things now are different. Dad is now 73. In a small way, our roles have reversed as they do when your parents age. We still have great conversations about art and life and solving the world’s problems but now it’s in between lunch and grocery shopping together once a week. The wonderful thing is Dad is still with me. So I can stop all this whining and just go see him even this late in the day. I’ll think I do that.
Happy Summer Solstice and Happy Father’s Day everyone. Go hug your dad if you can.
Learn more about me on the ‘About’ page under the additional links menu. I’m an artist – a painter mostly and an avid gardener. I paint a variety of subjects including birds, koi fish, my gardens, ponds and flowers as well as anything having to do with nature especially trees and tropical scenes. I also enjoy painting abstracts and have started created more and more of them. My most favorite thing to try to achieve in my painting is is mystery and telling mystical stories.
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